Part two of our series on the rush of new defensive coordinators this season. We’ll keep typing just to get away from the abominable fart of a pun we just laid there…GO!

Corwin Brown, Notre Dame.

Status: n00b. A mysterious, veiled enigmariddle of a cipherman brought in from the dark, Skull ‘n Bones-like Belichick fraternity to rebuild Notre Dame’s shameful defense. (Brown only got this privilege, presumably after confessing his whole sexual history while laying naked in a coffin in a dark, candlelit room.)

So new you can’t find photos of him in street clothes.

Skull ‘n Bones-style fraternal networking may be the only powerful explanation behind Weis hiring a guy just four years removed from playing defensive back in the NFL. (more…)

Yet another college sport is in the midst of, get this, a playoff to determine a national championship as the Super Regionals are finishing up nationwide to determine the 8 teams which will meet in Omaha for a double elimination tournament. It has us again wondering how much fun a college football playoff could be. We’d be willing to give up the 12th game and conference championships…. wouldn’t you? As we watch, though, we can’t help but wish they would just make the switch to wooden bats (and get rid of the DH). There is just something wrong about that annoying doink of an aluminum bat which replaces the beautiful crack of an ash Louisville Slugger. Oh, if only we could rule the world… or at least the NCAA. Disappointing as it may be, a savy college sports anchor could incorporate it into their broadcast as a catch phrase… just please footnote us when you use “Doink goes the boomstick” when calling a homerun.

For anyone who’s ever fucked up: college broadcasting at its finest. (In case you’re wondering about the background of the clip, read this at BenMaller.com. The poor kid ended up on Ball State alum David Letterman’s show last night.)

We have a word for men like this: hero.